Last Christmas, two weeks before, my wife and I received the greatest gift of all when our daughter was born. Nothing could have made my holiday more special as I sat in our living room holding the most amazing love my life had ever felt. Throughout the past year I watched my family grow and my daughter stand, walk, say “Da Da”, and I learned as much as I could to become the best father for her.
Around May on my blog at hackettstownfitness.com I wrote this post with 10 Things my daughter would learn from me and now 7 months later and more wise I decided to rewrite the post in hopes of taking her higher than her imagination can soar. I can see the dreamer in her already and her intelligence is beyond anything I have ever felt.
As a young man fresh out of the hard knock self induced lifestyle with a new family and a full time job, life is tough to maintain an ego based control over and, with a business that seems to roll over everything, I’ve handed the reins over to allow life to just be as it pleases. The grass grew longer this past summer and projects and family functions were passed over as well. Time seems to not last long enough to fit most of life and the fatigue that comes with a never ending pursuit of success and fatherhood has changed how I view the world. Before her birth, I was firing full steam ahead and moving beyond the scope of my abilities faster than I realized, almost losing control. But now, with my precious smile machine, much has changed. Instead of fighting to meet deadlines, I don’t set them, instead, I just allow whatever happens to roll along it’s natural way.
What has come more into my attention this past year, since her birth, has been the way of our society functions. Most of us are worker bees to the propaganda of our government, but more each day we’re awakening to the lies told. Going to school to learn how to operate within the machine, to learn how to become a slave to debts and interests, and beyond that has led me to begin this writing for her. I don’t want her to be among the commonalities of our society. I don’t want her to have to work her best days of life for the repayment of school funds and mortgages designed to stampede our creative and critical thinking. I want her to be as free as she can and live with the virtues of our natural way.
Here are 10 things I will Teach My Daughter-
1. Never Give Up and Accept Failure as part of the process.
There will be resistance around your life through every step and you may even be made fun of and laughed at. Using your open mind you will see that you’re free to go after and get whatever you want. Never give up, even when you fail. Remember it is okay to fail and it happens to everyone. It is okay to change your mind and reset your goals. Go in any direction you want and always do what you can.
2. Ask Many Questions.
Ask why you’re learning what you’re learning wherever you’re being taught. Ask if it’s true and don’t allow those you seek answers from to ignore your questions. At your place of employment, ask too many questions because you will learn and in the process, you’ll understand.
3. Love the Learning Process.
As you ask questions you may find it all overwhelming but embrace the learning processes and love it with your whole heart. Read when you don’t have to and see that books and other reading material opens a whole world beyond what you see day to day. Let your imagination flow with what you learn and truly, deeply, love it all.
Or meditate, but look inside for answers to your life. Pray when you need guidance or strength. Whether it’s to the universe or a god force beyond our power, pray. Talk to yourself, pray for things you want and for others.
5. Exercise and Make it A Part of Your Best Self.
Besides praying, diet, quietness, meditation, and learning, exercise is one of the most important parts of our well being. Exercise will make you strong, it will help you relax, it will give you confidence and self esteem as you grow into your best self. Start young and forever make it a part of your life.
6. Find Peace Beyond Material Things.
Many search for happiness and love through things such as cars, houses, jobs, and even animals. As you pray and look within you will find a greater peace. Accept it and understand material goods can never give you the emotional well being we all seek in life. “Stuff” owns you, you don’t own it. Don’t allow this to be.
7. Help others.
Donate to the needy. Spend time volunteering and if you run a business someday, give back through charity events. You will bring love into your life and fulfill a special part of your existence. Do it not for a personal outcome, instead, for the greater good.
8. Avoid the Status-Quo.
We live in a time where most of us do as told, believe what’s first reported, accept it, and buy into the status-quo of society. iPhones are regular, Black Friday is a souped up event, and the media reports only half the story. Much of all we have in life is the result of us being told that is what we should have. We’re taught to go to college so we can get a good job and buy into the system. To play the game and not stand out from the crowd. It’s all starting to change now and I hope that when you’re of age, it’s different and less systematized. Don’t even step into the assembly line. Think freely and clear before you make your hardest life decision. When you turn 18 you can go left or right. Choose wisely.
9. Be positive but embrace the negative, live for now.
Find the balance between positive and negative emotions and thoughts. It’s okay to believe negatively about situations. That means you’re thinking. Always being a positive person is just you lying to yourself. We can’t be overly positive about all we see but we can be happy about this life. You’ll find that happiness in only one place. Inside of you. There is only one moment that is meaningful to life, right here and right now. It can be a negative moment or a positive one but it comes and goes. Allow it, forgive if it needs forgiveness, accept it, love it, and then let it go.
10. Always Be You and Be Free.
Life may try to tell you no or show you something shinier. If it’s not who you are and what you believe, move away from it. Be what you see and feel inside and forever you will be free. Don’t let anything tie you down and don’t hold your true feelings inside. Let them out and speak your mind. The world needs more people who stand and say “That is not what I want and believe.” It may cause a ruckus, who cares. It comes and it goes. Don’t ever lie to yourself for the sake of others.
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson
The main point I will teach my daughter is that she is a limitless and infinite being that has the power to be what she wants and the only moment of her life that matters is right now. Her feelings and thoughts are original to her and the propaganda and forced education designed to remove that from her mind will not stand a chance. As her father, it is my duty to protect her and I will never allow her to be told how to think and what to think. She will never become a cog in the machine of our education system and will always live beyond the status-quo. That is my responsibility to her true authentic self.